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Tuesday, October 18, 2005


Gaming the Endgame: The Stevens Solution

We may at long last be finally seeing the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

It is possible that the grand jury investigating the Plamegate mess may be about to issue indictments in the case. It is quite possible indeed that Peter Fitzgerald's carefully aimed missile lobbed right at the heart of the Bushies' precariously stacked house of cards may bring said house of cards down upon the shifting sands of fortune on which it stands.

The game may be up for Bush, Cheney, Rove, Rummy, Condi, Wolfowitz, and the rest of the criminal cabal squatting in the halls of power.

The malignant fascist cancer that is the Republican Party of today may be about to implode. The only question now is this: what will replace their rapidly-crumbling facade?

The answer is really simple: a caretaker government until we can have another election to sort out this whole mess and get our country back on track.

Here's how I see it playing out (in the best of circumstances):

Rove gets indicted, is tried, and goes to prison. Cheney sees the handwriting on the wall and either up and quits or gets indicted before he can cut and run. Without his brain to tell him what to think and without the puppetmaster pulling his strings, Bush implodes, perhaps even on national television.

He's either forced to resign or he's impeached by the House, convicted by the Senate, and then is dragged out of the White House in handcuffs, along with the rest of his criminal cabal.

The rest of their minions flee prosecution and/or jump the gun.

We then have a dangerous situation. Seeing that Bush and his house of cards are both about to implode, cooler heads in both parties realize that, for the good of the country, it's time to step in and take over. The Democrats because they know this may be the only way to show the country that desperate times call for desperate measures and the Republicans because they want to save what's left of their party before it's dragged down with Bush will both realize that it's long past time to be responsible and do what's right for the country.

Now that both Bush and Cheney are gone, who gets to be president?

House Speaker Dennis Hastert is a no-go. He's in too deep with the Bushies from the get-go. He should be forced to resign and should be frog-marched in handcuffs and leg restraints along with the Bushies and their ilk to face justice for their many crimes. That leaves the President pro tem of the Senate to step in and mind the store until another election is held, unless Bush appoints a successor to Cheney (which I do not want to see happen) who'll save his bacon by pardoning him after he's forced out. I would hope the Republicans in congress would see such a move by Bush as the last, desperate attempt of a pathetic worm of a man to wiggle his way out of facing the consequences of his actions. I would hope they would reject such a move by Bush without even giving him the fig-leaf of a vote on the matter.

If Dennis Hastert is out, that means that my senator, Ted "Teddy Warbucks" Stevens gets to be caretaker president under this scenario.

Let me tell you a little bit about him and why I think this would be the best possible scenario for the country. Ted Stevens, despite being probably borderline senile and cursed with an ethically-challenged son, does actually, genuinely care about this country in his heart of hearts.

If he felt it was the right thing to do for the country (and to save his beloved Republican Party), he'd be honored and humbled to step in as caretaker president for the duration.

This is a good thing, because he won't have any real power behind him. He'll just be an amiable caretaker president until we can have a real election. With the Republican Party imploded, Stevens might very well end up as being the last Republican president this sorry excuse for a country will be saddled with.

He'll have to give up his cushy Senate seat to do this. Despite his gruff exterior, Ted Stevens actually has some vestigial sense of honor and integrity.

The real power for the duration of this crisis will be held by a consortium of Democratic representatives and senators allied with the few remaining moderate Republicans in congress to steer our country through this minefield it is in.

Then, in the end, Ted Stevens gets to preside over the demise of the Republican Party in America and he becomes as relevant as yesterday's news, riding off into the sunset at the end of the three years (or two, as the case may be).

Once he's out of the senate, we'll run a good candidate and win that seat for the Democrats, putting a Democrat back in that seat for a change.

We get our country back, Ted Stevens gets to cap off his career as a caretaker president, and hopefully the Republican Party will die with him long before he leaves the building.

That's my dream, and I am sticking to it.

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